SOUTH WALTON (THE 30A TRIBUNE) — After extensive deliberation, a fictional recent graduate has accepted the role of Vice President of Family Leisure Coordination. Duties include selecting weekend destinations, approving poolside playlists, and attending occasional meetings in designer loungewear.
The family described the position as highly competitive. Two cousins were reportedly interviewed, although neither had received the meeting invitation. The graduate will receive mentorship from a personal assistant with seventeen years of scheduling experience.
A performance review is expected after the first holiday weekend, provided it does not interfere with the employee’s travel plans.
There is, of course, no real resident, household or committee behind this report. The 30A Tribune publishes imaginary events and fictional characters for satirical entertainment.
